Ray
Boltz, who sold about 4.5 million records before retiring from Christian music
a few years ago, came out of the closet Friday to announce that he's gay.
In an
interview with the gay magazine The
Washington Blade, Boltz said he came out to his family and some close friends in
December 2004, but only now decided to go public with the news.
"I'd
denied it ever since I was a kid," Boltz, 55, told the magazine. "I
became a Christian, I thought that was the way to deal with this and I prayed
hard and tried for 30-some years and then at the end, I was just going, 'I'm
still gay. I know I am.' And I just got to the place where I couldn't take it
anymore — when I was going through all this darkness, I thought, 'Just end
this.' "
One
reason Boltz decided to come out now might be because he's performing Sunday at Jesus
Metropolitan Community Church in
Indianapolis, and then next Sunday, Sept. 21, at the Metropolitan
Community Church of
Washington, D.C. Both congregations are a part of a denomination that embraces the LGBT (Lesbian, Gay,
Bisexual and Transgender) community.
Boltz
is perhaps best known for his song "Thank
You," about a dream in which a Christian thanks the Sunday school
teacher who led him to Jesus. It was the GMA song of the year in 1990. Other
Boltz hits include "Watch the
Lamb," "The Anchor Holds," and "I Pledge Allegiance to the Lamb."
Boltz
also told The Blade that he doesn't want to get into
debates about Scripture and has no plans to "go into First Baptist or an
Assembly of God church and run in there and say, 'I'm gay and you need to love
me anyway.' "
For
him, the decision to come out is much more personal.
"This
is what it really comes down to," he says. "If this is the way God
made me, then this is the way I'm going to live. It's not like God made me this
way and he'll send me to hell if I am who he created me to be — I really feel
closer to God because I no longer hate myself."
Earlier,
Boltz had alluded to the issue on his official website, saying that if people
"knew who I really was, I would never be accepted."
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